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Bants with Rubies

My Owambe Story:Did I finally get a Sugar Daddy at the After party?

Slowly, slowly I lifted my hand not wanting to disturb her. Suddenly I brought I brought my hand down “thwack” on my skin. Finally I killed the stupid mosquito that had been disturbing me since*tssswwww*. It was officially the 1st of December, 2018 and I was killing mosquitoes because I was in church. To be able to get to the engagement and wedding easily, I stayed at my aunt’s place. The whole family came for a vigil and instead of catching upon my beauty sleep I had to come with them.

At this time last year I was at the club (no I am not a bad girl). You see the 1st of December, 2017 is the day I launched my website. So after saying a quick prayer of thanks for 1 year of love, I tried to go back to sleep. After all, today would also mark the day I finally snagged myself a sugar daddy.

10am wedding day

I hadn’t gotten as much sleep as I would have liked but I was hyped. My able trusted friend and MUA @theglamfaery was at my place already(that girl is punctual for Africa). My mother had called me and I assured her that I would be there in time for the wedding. This time I was sure I would snag my fine bobo because I won’t sit with mummy. I had invited a friend along for the fun and also so that I can sit far away from my family people. The night before the devil tried to ruin my fine girl, my dress nearly messed up,my earrings sort of got lost and I realized I didn’t have shoes to wear. In my panic I called four different friends, lamenting how my villager wantu catch me. But las las my God is good!!!

Make up sesh started and I was shifting my bum bum on the seat as usual. If it was a Nigerian hairdresser I for don chop knock sef. My friend came after that and touched up her make up too. Next thing I know it’s a little past 11pm and I’m rushing to call a taxify. The wedding was supposed to start by 11 oo but me I just left Ketu for the Island at 11pm. I was just praying that we get there in time so that my mother will not shout at me in public and spoil all my fine girl.

Jamming in the Taxify

my owambe wedding story

As fine girls always do when glammed up, we told the driver to turn up the stereo, and started taking pictures and making videos while trying to pose. You never can tell where your soul mate will find you oo. It can be inside taxify as he passes by in his Ferrari, abi? After doing that fora while and bobo no turn up we concluded that our guys are waiting for us at the wedding. It seemed like we were making progress o when we got into traffic. Eeeeh! It was already few minutes to 1pm.

Finally ooo, my haters have succeeded.Shay wedding wee not have finished like this? What if my bobo does not like party and is not at the engagement? Abi what of if they call him at work because he is the company Boss? He has to work now, you know for our money. God please oooo, just help me clear this hold–up so that I can meet the guy you have placed there for me.

Finally there

After almost praying my make up off, we finally got to the wedding.Late but at least, we arrived looking fine like barbecued chicken, with a side of fries and ketchup. *grrrr* that was the sound of my stomach protesting the fact that I had not eaten. Sucking in my little belly pooch (I’m extremely proud of the pooch junk food gave me) I walked in with my friend (let’s call her Ife for the sake of this story). Getting In we realized they were almost done with the wedding and there were no seats at the back so we stood outside for a bit.“Babe, where are the fine boys oo. I have not seen any” Ife asked. Scanning the area I noticed the same thing “ahan I cannot see any, you saw the pic I sent you now. Don’t worry they will be at the reception.” My heart in my chest I began to pray that these guys should not disgrace me. How can all the fine boys just disappear like that?

As I was contemplating going to pray in one corner, the newly wed – extremely fine- couple walked out with both the bride and groom’s train behind them. As I sighted the first handsome bar of chocolate with full beards, my heart went back to its position. Turning my head to the side, I smiled at Ife and she smiled back. It was time to catch big fish.

Is the Reception in another state ni?

After taking a couple of pictures at the wedding with mummy and other family members, plus me changing my outfit we left to get to the reception. I and Ife walked outside to wait for our taxify ride (we need a gift from taxify for all this rides). While waiting that’s how one car like that zoomed near us and just stopped. Some evidently drunk guys in the car now started practicing their absolutely hopeless pick-up lines. Unfortunately for them, our ride arrived just at that moment and we were in the car and off sharp sharp.

The taxify guy now asked us if we know the venue. We said no and agreed he should use the Google map. All was fine, until we were still going after 20 minutes. Asking the driver, he told us to look at the map and we saw we still had 20minutes more. Still following the map, we passed by the sea for a while, then went through a road that was wavy. The driver, I and Ife just kept laughing all through the ride hoping we were not lost. As soon as we saw the venue we all shouted for joy, me especially because this is my last chance to snag my Zaddy.

The Reception

Honestly, the venue was the most beautiful tent like thing I’ve seen. It was simply breathtaking. Following the ushers, we got situated on a table extremely far from my mother. Although the table was occupied by two couples I was still down to party. This reception seh! I must parrttaayyy!! As soon as we were seated, a waiter came to get our orders. As much as I wanted to eat the pounded yam, I opted for rice so that they will not think I am a foodie. I can show my true FFO status later.

my wedding owambe story

Settling down, we ate and enjoyed the program. As I saw the couple take their first dance, I just went ‘awwwwwwwwwwwwww’ me sef I go love ooo. Honestly, I was so hyped you would think I was the one marrying. How can I not show off when both the bride and her sisters are simply beautiful and I get to call them cousin #sheds tears of Joy.

Video

After all the serenre and the band playing for the “oldies”for a while, I and Ife went to see my mum. After assuring her we would go home in time we went back to our seats. The DJ soon started playing Jams and people were moving on their seats. At this point I and Ife decided to leave the venue at 7:30/8:00pm so as to get home in time. At just about 7:30 though the bride and groom made their grand entrance to fireworks and DJ hits. Everyone stood up for the newest couple in town, it was awesome.

To the After Party

After the grand entrance, everybody was up on their feet and dancing. The lights were dimmed, more food was going around (dessert), strobe lights were on and the DJ was giving hits back to back. At this point I was so caught up in all the fun that only 1/4 of my mind was on the fact that I was still waiting for my Sugar daddy. Going to the bar I tried to get baileys, but couldn’t. I ended up getting red wine for me and Ife. As we were working on the bottle, desserts started coming.

First I had a slice of red velvet cake with whipped cream and a cherry on top .Then I had another slice of chocolate cake and a cocktail.Then I shared out of Ife’s waffle and ice cream.
As the DJ dropped some “sakamanje” I and Ife were up and dancing. Lemme confess now, as I was dancing I was still scouting, ‘where art thou oh my sugar daddy?’Meanwhile there was this fine specimen of manhood on the next table beside me. As me I was eyeing him, he turned towards me. Yesss!!!!! Finally I found the one.The one that broke my heart was when he turned to look at Ife and smiled at her.Lobatan!!! Who did I offend in this life bayii ooo?!!! Tummy filled with sweets, happy from the red wine, I and Ife gave them moves back to back. The ZANKU I don’t even know how to dance, I sha danced it there.

The DJ now decided to kill it and played Askamaya –Teni .Immediately I lost all my home training in that place.
It was almost 9pm when I realized that my phone was dead and we needed to calla taxify to go home. Thank God for carrying charger up and down. We went looking for a place to charge and thankfully found the manager’s office. I plugged my phone and we went back to party.

Going Home

After Ife’s mum called her nothing less than 5 times we picked up my phone and went to wait for our ride. In my mind I was shedding tears because the party was just getting interesting nau. Sebi if I had a sugar daddy now, he would have bought me a car. Las las we got home okay after having so much fun. But I still didn’t get a Sugar Daddy.

Girls, tell me…. is there anything special I need to do??Because omo I really need to find a Zaddy ooo sharp sharp.
Hope you enjoyed the series? Show some love and drop a comment. I love y’all for staying with me through this. Xoxo rubies

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Life & Style

Take lit pictures this Christmas(7 easy steps)

pictures

Hey guys, I’m here with some photography tips and tricks for you all.  Its Christmas time and I trust my people we all want to pepper them on our feed. I do know that I am not the only one who loves the fact that during the season there are so many places that get a revamp with some really pretty decorations and lights. Especially on the island. Now I’m going to give you a few tips to taking pictures. Pictures that will brighten up your feed and get the likes rolling in.

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Uncategorized

My Stranger

him

Luckily for me he told me earlier that we were going out. It’s the first weekend in months that I’d had anywhere to go.

I was happy not really because of the outing but because the less time I spent with him indoors, the better – I was already feeling pressured even though he repeatedly told me he had no expectations.

Here I was sitting at a bar alone waiting for him when I noticed there was a guy sitting next to me. I looked at him noticing that his lips (just the perfect size) were crooked up in a sort of one sided smile and his eyes were on me. His cologne filled the air and I felt a tensing in my belly as I inhaled the utterly delicious scent.

‘Have I seen you before?’ he asked

‘Have you?’ I reply a slight smile on my face

‘Yes, I have. You are the angel from my dreams’ he says with a rueful smile on his face

I burst into laughter while miming slow clapping ‘that line is so corny it should not work but with that self-depreciating smile on your face, somehow it does.’

Really smiling now, he turns to fully face me and instantly I know I would never have a problem trying to remember his face.

‘Who are you here with?’

‘… My boyfriend…’

But he hears he question in my voice and his eyes let me know it’s okay.

‘Who are you here with?’ I ask

‘A girl’ is his reply and I can hear all the unspoken messages he’s trying to tell me.

‘Here is my personal number’ he says tapping a number on the card ‘call me sometime, it is totally up to you’

Taking the card, I turn it over and ask for a pen. He gives me one and I write my phone number down on it. Capping the pen, I hand them both back to him.

‘I have made my choice. There is my number you call me….’ ‘But only if you want to…’ I add

I can see the tension leave his shoulders and he smiles at me as he stands up to leave. He leaves just as abruptly as he came but not before I feel the feather light touch of his fingers trail a short distance over my bare shoulders. I smile because he gets that too, that I needed touch to assure me that this is reality.

Finally, I see my boyfriend walking toward me with the food I asked for and I’m wondering how suddenly all the butterflies are gone.

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diary Lifestyle Uncategorized

New Year New Goals

It’s a few days to the new year 2018 (somebody say yeah yeah) and there are a lot of things that we all want to do better or not do at all or start doing. I personally want to attend a lot of Owambe’s (I passed through 2017 without as much as one Owambe).Every year we as people tally our wins and losses and from all the lessons we learnt throughout the year, we put up a list of what to do to make the next year better and we then tag it ‘new year resolutions’, but the thing is, we can go back to our drawing board anytime not necessarily only at the end of the year.

I came across an article about how making a New Year’s resolution was setting yourself up for failure and I thought of doing a column on New Year resolution fails but somehow I diverted. But first let’s tackle why I think New Year resolutions are bullcrap.

#THE TITLE-‘New Year Resolutions’

Honestly, 90% of the problem is the mentality of people concerning the name. New Year’s resolutions are same as everyday goals the only difference being that they are goals for the start of a new quarter. Unfortunately people start adding goals to their new year’s resolution even from June…and I’m simply left speechless. Waiting to start a goal in the new year is simply procrastination(how about starting that gym membership in November, forget January).I have set in past years new year resolutions and I have found out that most times I barely achieve 50% before the year runs out.

#UNREASONABLE GOALS

Imagine me a student with no extra source of income setting ‘get a new car this year’ as my New Year resolution. Short term goals are the most practical method of setting goals. Even if you set long term goals (a necessary evil), break them down into short term achievable actions and have the determination to see them through. Every single goal you set should reflect your self-growth. What do you want to see at the end of the year? The student who set the ‘new car’ resolution could have set ‘ get a part time vocational skill’ and ‘start saving for a car’ as his/her goals instead. Goals are meant to be practical not fantasy.

Having said all that we all need to set goals that will help guide us to  our dreams this new quarter.as Earl Nightingale said “People with goals succeed because they know where they are going” so I have highlighted a few aspects of our lives to help us set important achievable goals.

GOD

Seeing the New Year is a blessing we should never take for granted. No matter what religion we practice or beliefs we have, getting closer to GOD should definitely top the list

FAMILY

Our family is our rock .as they say blood is thicker than water we should always strive to have better relationships in our families

SCHOOL /WORK

We all have big goals and big dreams but without a concrete plan and a determination to work toward it cannot be acheived.

  • In our schools set a goal for your GP and how you plan to achieve it.Barely passing is definitely not the best way to pass
  • In this day and age every student should be an entrepreneur. The rich are the ones with the ideas outside the box, nobody depends on their certificate alone now. Start doing something.
  • The best way to work is to work hard and be promoted. Set goals for how you want to improve your work ethics.

Dream big, work hard.no matter what your dreams are you need to know that without hard work that is all they would remain ‘DREAMS’.

PERSONAL LIFE

  • First I think should definitely be self-love. Self-love can never be over emphasized, no matter how secure you are in yourself you need to always have time to remind yourself of who you are, lift your self-esteem even higher and simply be proud to be who you are ignoring whatever society says.
  • We should also set goals that help us take responsibility of the things that happen in our lives.be in charge of your life, steer it where you want it to go.
  • Set goals to make you better. For example i will be exercising daily, or i will eat more fruits.

LOVE LIFE

The significant other in your life also deserves a new improved you. Look at your relationships how far you have gone, how far you want to go. Are there changes you need to make to make for a smoother relationship? This is what makes you a good partner.

If you pick all this and make a New Year resolution list, I definitely trust that with consistency and determination at the end of the New Year you would have checked off at least 80% of your goals.

I hope this post helped you out, if you have any questions or contribution just leave a comment and if you need any help you can also email me and I’ll be sure to get back to you.Dont forget to like this post and also follow us on all our social media handles.

Happy New Year In A Few Hours!!!!!!!

Lots of love from this side,

RUBIES.

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